93 'til Infinity

Megha and I Broke Up 5/18/13

It’s been a long time coming. Even though I knew that it was going to happen, it hurts something bad. I really feel like i’m letting go of something wonderful. There has never been another person who has found me so perfect. She truly cares for me, she truly loves me. I’m confused on how to feel. On one hand, i do think it is time for a change. I’ve been going out a lot and I think I am ready to live life a little more. On the other hand, I really love this girl. I love her quirks. I love her laugh, her smile, her cuteness, and her unexplained ability to be kind to literally everyone. I am going to miss her “mornin” texts. I am going to miss calling her my bear and my jewel. I am going to miss asking for good luck kisses. I am going to miss telling her about all my accomplishments in hope that she will be proud of me. I will miss being around her. I will miss pretending to be mad at her so that we can make up. I will miss holding and kissing her. I wonder if this is the end. We both agreed that it isn’t the right time for either of us to be in a relationship. We are both really busy. I am busy at school. She is busy dealing with the death of her father. I wish I would have shown more support to her during this time. She deserved more from me. If I ever have the chance to date her again, I will do my best to treat her like the beautiful person she is. 

We really are very different and at some point that has to matter. I just hope that I am not giving up on the greatest person I know and possibly the greatest blessing in my life. 

If you see me in a fight with a bear, prey for the bear”. Ive always loved that quote. Thats “mamba mentality” we don’t quit, we don’t cower, we don’t run. We endure and conquer.

—Kobe Bryant after tearing his achilles

I was going to rip his heart out.

I’m the best ever.

I’m the most brutal and most vicious and most ruthless champion there has ever been!

There no one that can stop me.

Lennox is a conqueror?

NO! I’m Alexander!

He’s no Alexander!

I’m the best ever!

There’s never been anybody as ruthless!

I’m Sonny Liston. I’m Jack Dempsey! There’s no one like me!

I’m from their cloth!

There’s no one that can match me!

My style is impetuous! My defense is impregnable! And I’m just ferocious!

I want your heart! I want to eat his children!

Never say never, because limits, like fears, are often just an illusion.

—Michael Jordan

Legacy

Aging means losing things, and not just eyesight and flexibility. It means watching the accomplishments of your youth be diminished, maybe in your own eyes through perspective, maybe in the eyes of others through cultural amnesia. Most people live anonymous lives, and when they grow old and die, any record of their existence is blown away. They’re forgotten, some more slowly than others, but eventually it happens to virtually everyone. Yet for the few people in each generation who reach the very pinnacle of fame and achievement, a mirage flickers: immortality. They come to believe in it. Even after Jordan is gone, he knows people will remember him. Here lies the greatest basketball player of all time. That’s his epitaph. When he walked off the court for the last time, he must have believed that nothing could ever diminish what he’d done. That knowledge would be his shield against aging.

Spoper love

“What time is it?! Niebla time! I came into orientation skeptical and not really interested in uci, but now I am beyond stoked. If these 2 days reflect what my 4 years here are going to be like, I may never want to leave! Thank you jin!!! And Charles and Ashwin!”

“Sami, Kurtis, Jennica, Ashwin, JJ, J-Phan, YOU GUYS ARE ALL GREAT! I love your enthusiasm, and love toward the spoppers. I hope we will be able to see each other again in campus! By the way, because of you guys I want to be a Staffer too! :) Thank you for you hard work”

“Ashwin Padalkar was a great role model with a great sense of humor that allowed spopers to feel comfortable and allowed them to open up. Helen Park was a great leader who also allowed spopers to feel comfortable with one another mainly because she was super nice. Overall the staff of Neibla in SPOP 8 was very successful in all they did and truly allowed us all to come together as family. I would like to say I was truly honored to have them as staff leaders for they all showed the chancellor’s values in everyway.”



AGT

Monica MandapatWe staffed for the first time during SPOP 4, and I don’t know if you were nervous but I sure was! I asked how you were holding up as a staffer ‘cause I thought I was a hot mess, and all I heard about you were great things. Hope you had a great time!

Melody LiuAshwin<3 I’m so glad that we spent that car ride together to and from Vegas, taking turns keeping David awake during the drive :P I know we didn’t really get the chance to get to know each other very well throughout SPOP but I’m so happy that we had the opportunity to bond and talk at the end!(: You’re such a sweet guy and I felt really comfortable with you in such a short period of time. I would love to hang out and learn more about you. This is just the beginning of our friendship! Promise we’ll play this year?(:

Christopher Bungermother fuckin ashwin
whats good man. so basically youre dope haha its been a pleasure getting to kick it with you throughout spop and more so after spop. we have to ball more and i still have your shoes haha i like how you try to match me shot for shot in vegas but failed to do so. its ok i appreciate the effort haha but man i’m glad i got to know you and i look forward to seeing you more once school starts and when we start balling a lot more

Sarah CastroI know we never got the chance to talk that much until sprom (a little), but I always saw how kind and smiley you were. It always made me feel comfortable enough to be myself because I knew you would accept me with no judgment. You have a huge heart and the ability to touch those around you. We never staffed together, but there is no doubt in my mind that you were there for your spoppers and made every possible difference. I truly hope that our paths cross again so we can get to know each other more.

Anella AquinoAshwin! You were always super dependable and ready to do work this summer, and I always appreciated that. I can’t believe you’re a 1st year! Please, don’t be a stranger…hopefully i’ll see you around!

Megan AndoLittle brotherrr, I’ve been soo blessed to have someone like you in my life and be able to call you my brother. I love you sooo much Ashwin! I see so much potential in you and I’m so proud of everything that you’ve accomplished here already at UCI with SPOP and your sports med job. I loved watching you staff but I wish we could’ve staffed a hall together.. I hope you continue to… I’m about to sound really cheesy.. let your light shine… because I think you’re amazing. See you in a few weeks when I get back! Luckily I won’t have to bum it on your vdc couch (: so now we can play at my new place all the time! Love you again!<3

anonymous 
Hi Ashwin :)

I know we haven’t really gotten a chance to get to know each other, but I would really like to have the chance too. I mean, we got a whole year righttt? :)

Danielle McGuireAshwin! Whattup fellow Laker fan! I know we haven’t interacted too much throughout SPOP, and I wish I could’ve staffed with you and gotten to know you more, but just because SPOP is over doesn’t mean we can’t still make up for it :) I’d love to hang out with you! Let us balllll

Angie NgASHLEY WALKER! ;)

Hello splittle brother <3 I don’t even know where to start with you. I think you’re amazing. I think you’re wonderful. I think you’re just an inspirational person. Being the freshmen babies of DNA has brought us closer together and I wish that you weren’t always so busy so we could hang out! I always enjoyed our conversations with the family, especially the ones involving significant others because we seem to have the same mentality towards them haha. Your work ethic and attitude towards everything you do is so inspiring; honestly I can’t begin to tell you how much I admire you. I can’twait to go to Vegas with you and the fam. Shit’s going to get CRAZYYY up in there! Haha. We’ve got the rest of our years at UCI together, and I really hope that we can stay close throughout them. I love you, little bro! (:

Jeannie VuongAshwin! I enjoyed getting to know you better at Arrowhead under that staircase with Kevin and some other staffers! We didn’t get to staff together but I’m sure you changed lives :)

Yvonne VoAshwin! I thiink I first met you during Arrowhead. I might have met you before that, but I think Arrowhead was when I actually interacted with you :) I am preeeetty positive that you, Jeannie, Kevin, and I were in the closet having a conversation. So random. Hope you weren’t too gone to remember that :) I also saw you at Volcano Tea that one night! But other than those two encounters, we’ve never really interacted after that :’( Such a shame. Of the guy staffers in SPOP, you were one of the few that I would be more comfortable approaching. I think that smile of yours is very warming and comforting. Don’t ever stop smiling! Enjoy the rest of your summer and don’t ever stop changing lives for the better :) Tie-Dye Love!

Misha EucephAshwin,
We just met a couple of days ago, but I am so happy I met you through SPOP. You have such a kind aura surrounding you and I’m excited to get to know you better. Stay you!

Sarah WongAshwin! 
Funnily enough, we never interacted until the night of sprom! I think it was that night after our 5am run to Del Taco that we were able to connect, right before we all fell asleep :D anyways, I just wanted to let you know that you’re incredibly genuine and kind and by far one of the sincerest people I have had the pleasure of knowing. I remember something you said that I don’t think I can ever shake from my memory: “I wish I could just drive to San Jose and pick up Megan so she could have come to sprom”. That one sentence told me everything there is to know about you and your sweet personality. You are so personable, so relatable, and I hope that we can get to know each other even better throughout the school year :)

Justin ProfeniusSpopper! I still remember when I interviewed you and you told me I was your staffer and I was just like “fuck” because I forgot LOL. I’m sorry! But anyway, I’m super proud of you man. You’ve grown so much this year and I know that you did great things at this program. You were so willing to help others whether it be walking people places or just doing small tasks that we needed to cover. You always had a positive attitude about everything and that’s something that I really appreciated. I hope you enjoyed your experience this year, I know that you’ll continue to do great things whether it’s in this program or elsewhere at UCI. Let me know if you ever need anything, I’m always here for you. Let’s grab food and kick it sometime forreal haha. I’m proud of you man, I’m glad I got to share this summer with you.

Joanna RomanaAshwin! You are such a little brotha’! Haha I’ve said that before and I’ll always be saying it! You really broke out of your shell throughout SPOP, and I’m so proud of you for that! Even though you were the youngest, you were a lot of fun and I can definitely seeing you do so much more in the next couple of years here at UCI! :) Keep it up!

Ashley HughASH. AND. ASH. yay ash connection!
i like how chill you are and how you asked those girls for me EVEN though you ended up ratting me out on my plan i got so excited i thought it was so perfect LOL. but yeah, hope to see you around! :)

anonymous 
wats up coolio. You’re so awesome




Kevin LamAshwin! I remember meeting you when we had our suite discussion during weekend training. You’re a real chill dude. I don’t think we really had much interaction until SProm. You my friend, you are a trooper. You danced like all night long and still kept going! Thanks for your words of wisdom! But yeah besides that specific event you’re just straight up chill like an ice cube. I’m glad to have met you and thank you for everything you’ve done.

Angie SongHey Ashwin! I’m so happy that I got to staff my TLO with you. If it wasn’t for SPOP 8 I would’ve never gotten to know you and that would’ve sucked. You’re so chill and great to be around and I hope to see you around during the upcoming school year! :)

anonymous 
you have a lot of potential. your a warm hearted person.

Kylie BaranowskiAshwin, I was so glad to be there to staff your first SPOP with you. You were truly wonderful! I know that you really made the Spoppers feel so comfortable and welcome. I was so proud of you, because the first SPOP can be really tough, being thrown into a situation and not knowing what to expect. You were really able to shine. I can definitely see why you were chosen for SPOP staff. You are a great guy and I hope we can run into each other around campus!

John TorresASHWIN PADALKAR TORRES,
I got a grip of things to say to you homie. Forreal though, I remember way back at TV Themes, my very first real college party. Jin introduced me to some of his kids, who were coincidentally first years too! It was exciting to meet more of our breed. We talked about random shit, like classes, Middle Earth, and drank some more. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.
Throughout this whole SPOP staffing experience, I’m glad I made a very special friend out of it. You really are one of the people I’m closer with on staff, and I really appreciate your company. We have memories hella. And I’m sure we’ll drink again to our grip of memories.
You’re a truly incredible individual, and I hope you keep doing what you’re doing. We have a few more years to keep the party going, so don’t forget who I am!

Because remember: Once you enter my life, you’re not allowed to leave it.

With much sp-love,
John Hermes Torres

Cheryl Ann ValdezAshwin, thank you againn for joining me on the Ask an Anteater panel! You know, every time I see you and say hi, I have a flashback of your SPOP interview with JPro and I. I’ll never forget how JPro just blurted out “Ohh shiiit” when you mentioned that you were his spopper, hahaha. It’s been a blast working with you this summer! Best of luck with the rest of your time at UCI! [: <3

Daniel GrantAshwin!!! I love ya man! You were like the first person I met in spop, it was you and vanessa. Man I just loved all our sport talks and I expect many more to happen in the future especially if you get that KUCI show like you were talking about. Well I’ll see ya around man and we need to watch some games together!!!

Hephzibah KimOh Ashwin,
It’s been a little over a year since we met. I remember when we were in the same spolympics group, and I was totally being a meanie shooting down your great idea for proposals.
And now, look where we are, right int he shoes of all our staffers!

It would’ve been great staffing together, but I’m just so grateful to have met you at SPOP and to have been on staff with you.
One thing that sticks out to me is that you have this cool composure in all circumstances. I’m proud to say that I met Ashwin at our own SPOP, and I think it’s because I’m proud to see where you are today :)
SPOP 3 2011, GRAY HAVENGERS<3
Love ya Spopbrotha<3

Kristin KimuraAshwin!
I think the first time I met you was TV theme party at the after party when we were playing 10 fingers LOL. Although we didn’t get to talk much this time around, I’m glad we were able to have fun with each other at SPROM! Thanks for sandwiching me :) HAHAHHA

Kruti ShahAshwin, I am SO happy that I got the chance to staff with you and get to know you better! I felt that we didn’t really talk much before, and I’m glad I got to spend my last spop staffing with such an amazing unique person like yourself. You were so great with all of the spoppers, and you can tell that they absolutely loved you! Your energy, your enthusiasm and overall personality definitely shines. I really admire you as a staffer and everything that you’ve accomplished this summer. I’m sad that its all coming to an end, but that doesn’t mean anything…remember FOREVER STAFFERS!! hahah but we will definitely have to keep in touch and hang out :)

Helen ParkLittle Assman, haha just kidding Ashwin! I loved staffing with you and I think staffing at spop 8 was really the first time we interacted. Im really glad to have gotten a chance to know you better. Youre super easy to talk to, funny, and not afraid to open up which made you a great staffer. By creating that environment for the staffers you really enabled the spoppers to also open up and remember to have fun and be themselves. Continue to do what you do! I see so much potential in you! :)

Wes KosekiAshwin, meeting you during SPOP has been a pleasure and although you may have just finished your first year at UCI, you carry yourself like a seasoned UCI veteran. I’m looking forward to see what you do in the next few years. If staffing is any indication, I can already tell you’re ambition and genuine personality are going to take you to great things.

Nathan RuffIm glad that I got to staff with you!!! I had not had many interactions with you before hand and after staffing i feel that we have become a lot closer and that i have a greater appreciation for you. I think that you are a great person and im glad that I got to see that side of you through spop! Thank you for being so open and honest with me and all of us who staffed! :)


“Get off that slave ship

Build your own pyramids

Write your own hieroglyphs.” 

“There are certain kinds of people that are purely driven. I can tell who they are simply by looking at them. I have faced so much criticism for my drive that at times it has alienated me from the majority: the people who are comfortable with second place, the people who hate against me because I am not. You know these kinds of people; they are the ones who fear winning, the jealous ones who envy and try to sabotage. They are the people who have been telling me I couldn’t win all my life. Many times my drive to succeed has put me on an island all by myself because no one understood me, or they chose to misunderstand me. They chose to portray me as being something that I was not. I have learned that it is OK for me to be me, and what being me entails. It means that I will not rest; I will not sleep, relax, relent or be satisfied until my goals have been met, the challenges answered and my doubters silenced. I will not give in to my foes; I won’t let down my teammates. I won’t stop inspiring those who look up to me or stop giving motivation to those who motivate me. I will not back off until I’m back on top, back in the place where they say I could never be again.” - Kobe Bryant